Historical Tirade #2: Benjamin Butler’s Prostitute Law

By Tresckow

All women are whores!

It's a fact (not widespread I'm sure) that Union Major General Benjamin Butler was the military governor of New Orleans during the latter half of the United States Civil War. He was a sharp witted man that ruled the city with a dedicated Union agenda and an iron fist. He was effective in quelling rebellion, choking underground supplies from sympathizers to the Confederate army, and being a less popular political figure than California's Gray Davis.

Butler needed someone other than himself to be in charge of public relations. I understand the need to enforce order as brutally as necessary (how else do you enforce order?), but to declare ANY woman that shows disrespect to a union soldier a prostitute may not have been the best career move. Although I admire his inventiveness, I would have gone another route. Burn down a house, confiscate their valuables, but don't go there, Ben! After all, what does history remember him for? It's not that he privately financed a small unit of gatling guns to protect his troops in battle. It's not for his tactical talents that helped him win skirmishes with the enemy. It's for his ineptitude with women.

With Butler's public relations machine going full force, it's a wonder why New Orleans started to sell chamber pots with his face painted on the inside of them. At least he's still famous in the Big Easy.